Honestly, I feel like my insides are churning, and I'm going to throw them up soon. I can't eat because if I do, I'll just puke it all out anyway. My eyes constantly sting. My chest hurts. I feel like somebody placed anvils inside my heart on purpose, just to make it feel this heavy. I've never felt so much longing and misery in my life.
I feel pathetic, because I have the urge to tell my story to everyone I meet. Some I see more often than others, so I retell my story...and retell it...and retell it. I am sorry if your ears are bleeding with my whining. Please understand.
I am on the edge. I am about to jump off. I never really understood why people hurt themselves over love, but now I do; because if you hurt yourself, you'll finally get the attention you yearn for.
You. You can either make me or break me with whatever you say. I don't know why you have so much control over my heart. I don't know why I let you get to me. But all I know is I can't imagine living in a world where our paths cross, but our eyes do not.
I am chasing you once more. I feel like I've done this countless times, but I also feel that it is worth it.
I ask for people's advice, but I listen only to what I want to hear. Chase him. Chase him, she said. She who knows me best and longest. She who is very much like me, in mind and in skill.
How I wish I could just move on. Move on and forget all about you. But I am in so much pain, and it's hurting me more than I expected it to. I want it to subside now.
All I want is your audience. Humor me one last time. Hear me out and give me closure.
